A quiet place to reflect on your own belonging

The Quiet Room

Belonging grows through four parts that shape one another. These are the skills you bring, the opportunities around you, your drive to connect and the way you interpret your experiences. Reflect on each, choose where you want to grow, and leave with a plan of ideas matched to your answers.

This is a reflection, not a test. It will never tell you whether you belong.

Also free. Get your coping report

Settle in

Choose a sound, breathe with the circle, and sit with a question.

The sound is made inside your browser, and nothing is recorded or saved. When you are ready, the reflection below helps you turn it into a plan.

For researchers and practitioners, Kelly-Ann Allen's belonging measures are free to use. Find them in Measures.

Beta version

About these statements. This reflection is a beta version and is still being tested, so it may change. The statements come from a measure of the Integrative Framework of Belonging that Kelly-Ann Allen and Alexander Whitelock-Wainwright are validating, and which is not yet published. Your answers stay in your browser and are never saved or sent anywhere.

Step 1 of 2

Build your own framework.

Most models of belonging appear as a fixed diagram, the same shape for everyone and the same shape forever. Yours will not. The Integrative Framework of Belonging describes four components, competencies, opportunities, motivations and perceptions, that shape one another and shift across contexts and over time. As you respond to each statement, the petal for that component grows, and the framework that emerges is your own. Come back after a new job, a move or a hard term and it may look different, because belonging changes as your life does. There are no right answers. Your framework shows where your energy might go next, never whether you belong.

Allen, K.-A., Kern, M. L., Rozek, C. S., McInerney, D. M., & Slavich, G. M. (2021). Belonging: A review of conceptual issues, an integrative framework, and directions for future research. Australian Journal of Psychology, 73(1), 87–102. https://doi.org/10.1080/00049530.2021.1883409

Social, cultural, environmentaland temporal contexts and experiencesSense ofbelongingCompetencies0 of 0Opportunities0 of 0Motivations0 of 0Perceptions0 of 0

Step 2 of 2

Choose where you can grow

Pick one or two parts you would like to work on. Your plan will start here, and it will also point to any part where your answers suggest a real need. You can come back any time, and your framework may look different when you do.

Nothing you enter leaves this page.

Your plan

Your belonging plan.

Belonging can take time to build, and setbacks are part of it. If feeling disconnected is weighing on you, talk with someone you trust, your doctor or a psychologist. In Australia you can call Lifeline on 13 11 14 at any hour.

Free for adults and young people

How do you cope?

Get your free personal coping report. The coping scales developed by Erica Frydenberg and Ramon Lewis show which strategies you reach for when life gets hard, and how helpful each one is for you.

  • 20 coping strategies
  • How often and how helpful
  • Report emailed to you